Three Thousand Calories

Not too good:

That was yesterday. My weekend was a "fail" if I was supposed to track calories, eat with in my range. You know, those things.

Loss delayed gain.

I have to look at what was working for me in the past, and I had been doing that challenge when I was down to 249. I'll have to reel that back in again.

No soda/artificially sweetened drinks 

No alcohol 

At least 20-minutes of walking each day 

Log all calories eaten 

Water intake of 8 8-oz. glasses per day

If I remember correctly I was carb cycling during this challenge. My difficulty seems to come in on weekends. I do hard work all week, then weekends set in and with everything going on around here, I am not paying the attention I should. I don't fly off the handle, but I do drink too much and eat too much (even if I'm eating the "right" things).

Every day is a new day!

Weigh In: 249

I'm going to go ahead and weigh in today. I kind of don't want to, because I would be all happy to weigh in Wednesday and maybe be down even more - but then I'd be getting greedy. We'll see.

I weighed myself on Friday and I was 249, and I weighed myself today and I was 249, so we'll let it stick and hope it survives through the week.

Which is a concern for a couple reasons:

1.) I'm going camping, and I don't know if that will be good or bad for me food/weigh-wise. It could be good because I'll be more active, but it could be bad because I won't be weighing or logging my foods for about 3 days.

2.) It's almost my time of month, which is a bummer for more than the obvious reasons (weight gain, feeling miserable).

I can't believe I didn't look at the fact that I'd be more than likely getting a period around the time I booked our camping trip with friends. I seriously. Can't. Understand. Myself. I just hope and pray that it isn't a misery period. I apologize for the TMI, but I'm having a slight moment of panic. Camping and periods don't really go in harmony.

Besides that it is going to be hot. Like over 90-degrees hot. I don't like heat.

All these things for me to worry obsessively over, and I will.

But back to my weight - hell-LO?! I made it out of the 250s in July!

My weekend went well - I did good on Saturday. I'm sure I went over calories, and I had a few drinks, but I didn't go hog wild.

Yesterday I "treated" myself to one bite of a pizza. It was a treat, and honestly - it was enough. I didn't expect that at all (for it to be enough).

So this week challenge has been interesting and fruitful. I plan on continuing with the same ideas through Wednesday. I'm happy with the loss. Now I just have to hold it. The next 2 weekends are booked with trips, which I know will make it difficult. But I should be able to manage it.

It is VERY hot here this week, and extremely busy for me. I don't know if I'll be able to get on my longer walks, or to the gym. So I'll have to fit in steps other ways. I'm aiming for 30 minutes per day for the next three days, but it will be a challenge because of my schedule.

3-Day (Possible 5-day modified) Challenge (calorie cycling again)
No drinks (soda or alcohol).
Walk 30 minutes a day (minimum 5000 steps on my Fitbit).
Track my food.
Drink my water.

All of those are important.
While I'm on vacay, I'm just going to stick to my eating plan, move as much as possible, enjoy myself as much as possible (not with foods, but with activities and relaxation).

Above all - I'm going to TRY not to worry about it or sweat it too much. Keep myself accountable, but relax if I can.

One other thing - my scale (the food one) broke. I'd love to say I don't need it, and I don't too much. I pretty much know what a serving size is of the foods I eat. BUT I'm not there yet, and I need it still. The one I've been using is a postal scale. I'll have to see what I can find ASAP.

Weigh In: 276

I was FINALLY ASKED IF I'VE LOST WEIGHT.

That's one of my goals, to have someone ask if I've lost. Chhhheeeee-eck. Down. Unfortunately it was the same person who asked me last time (my sis-in-law) when I set that as a goal. So... I'm going to wait for someone else to ask me. But it was good to have someone notice something.


I weighed myself THREE times today. First it was 276. Then, I went to the bathroom and it went to 277 (what the fudge?) - then I did a final weigh in and it was back at 276. That's where I'm keeping it.

If it's wrong, the scale will remind me of that next time. And I'm due for a period again, so I'm sure it will remind me with blazing fury.


I don't know if that's success or not. Maintaining through a brutal food-laden holiday. Somewhat of success, I guess. I really could have gotten on that train Wednesday night and rode it bareback through Sunday. Maybe even through Monday. Then I would tell myself that I'd skip the weigh in, for shielding horror's sake, and wait until next week. Then next week, decide to wait one more because of my period, and allow two weeks to fly by, and who knows where I'd be.

It's not far-fetched. In fact, when I really think about it, trying to lose (or maintain) through the holidays is... pretty bold. Cocky, you might even say.

Well, I'm feeling cocky. I am fine with my maintaining of 276. Sure, I'd like to have dipped to 275 this week, but oh well. I didin't. I didn't shoot up to 280, which would have been devastating (and could have easily happened).

I'm back on track, counting my calories. Though I'm tired of it, novelty worn off. The desire to lose weight hasn't, so the discipline of monitoring my intake is still there. It's tiring and annoying and one more thing to do. But, it's also gotten me some results.

I feel better. I'm more confident. Just those two things alone are worth it.

I'm still determined to get below 250 here. To show myself that my 265 wasn't the lowest, and isn't. That I CAN do it. I'm scared. I am. Trying not to let the fear stop me. Fear of success, fear of failure. Fear of change. Of being pushed outside my comfort zone. Lots of fears.

THIS WEEK:
This week my challenge is going to be that I am busy. We have a large event being planned for the weekend and I'm one of the people in charge of it. I will be busy preparing. That might be good (because I'll eat less, be busy), or bad (because I'll be stressed and will eat). I'm hoping for the first option.

I also have some emotional stress I'm dealing with, so I'll want more than one glass of wine on occasion. I love my wine. I do, I do.

Finally, my period is coming up. Sometimes that brings on cravings that are, frankly, non-human. I've never really mastered that problem.

Mind over matter. Keep mind from getting too tired so it can continue the good fight.

Life Management

My obstacles this week and weekend will be time.

We are going on a small vacation (traveling to visit family). I will be cooking meals while we are away and will have limited access to internet (which is how I track my food). Instead of looking at it as some horrible curse, I will take it on as a challenge. With the beautiful weather we look to have, I should have ample exercise time.

I should be able to plan things out enough that I can get some easy meals in without going over my calorie budget. But, that means I need to prioritize that ahead of other things.

The hard thing, for me, is the more time I put into calorie-tracking, walking, etc., the less time I put into home management and life management.

But, in the long run, if I don't take care of myself and let myself be fat, I'm pretty miserable. I've felt pretty good this week. A couple times I was frustrated that I had to think about food so much and couldn't just eat and not worry about it so much. But logically, that doesn't hit the same level of frustration of not being able to fit into my clothes. Of going to the store and not liking anything because I'm dissatisfied with the body I'm in.

I've been very frustrated lately with my body. I'm sure that frustration has leaked over to other areas of my life.

So, that concept on the tip of my brain - I'm going to get off here and get some things done!