So, how's that JOY thing going for me?
You can't hear my sarcasm, so it doesn't matter.
But, here's the thing: I'm trying. I'm working. I'm shifting my thoughts. I have a hump that need to get through. To power through. A funeral. I don't do very well with that stuff.
And then some other things.
My eating has been OK. But my mindfulness on the disastrous state of crankiness is at an all-time high, which makes me think I'm onto something.
I sincerely believe if I can tackle some of my joy-sapping behaviors, the food part will follow.
It's not quick, easy, or painless.
So, my JOY for today?
Cooking dinner for my family. (Food-related, I know this.) Chicken, rice, macaroni and cheese, and kale. Bacon. All of that. But getting some hearty food on the table for my family amidst the chaos. And watching my kids eat happily. Not to the point of being stuffed, fat and unhappy, but healthfully. That means SO much. They can lead by example and I can follow.
I had more than I should have (especially in the wine department). But I'm allowing myself to wallow in some greif. To get it out.
I'm still thankful for a nice view out a hospital window.
The smell of clean laundry.
A new appliance being delivered soon.
Healthy, happy kids.
A doggy that loves me unconditionally. Who is soft and special.
A boss who is willing to let me off early so I can wallow in my sadness.
A renewed sense of being comfortable with who I am.
I'm on my way. Slowly.
Mind and spirit first, body second.