I'm a good listener. It has its drawbacks. When you're so darn good at listening (when it counts), people forget you might have something to say. I say a lot. I talk. But not always when it counts. Not always when my heart is bleeding and I need a band-aid.
This has been bothering me lately. The more I thought about it, though, the more I realized I should be grateful for my capacity to lend an ear. For the times when people have said, "You should be a counselor." Or thanked me. There were times when it was my own boss who said those words.
I felt good. Not a proud good, but a good feeling. I don't have tons of money, I don't have a lot of time. But I do have ears that can listen, empathize; a heart that can weep and encourage.
To be able to give that away should be a blessing, not a curse. Today I am remaining thankful for that gift.
There are parts of me that are good, but I've stuffed them down and rejected them and I'm not sure why. As much as I'd love to lose weight, be skinny and have the physical attributes I desire, I also want to find myself in the process. There are these small glimmers of hope that I can do that. I am ready to do that.