I said it. I know I have to, I just don't know how or when. I know that, optimally, it would be nice to do it and have a break. Maybe a month. It would be hard (financially), but I think that's where I'm at mentally and emotionally. If I don't do it soon I might have a nervous breakdown.
It's hard because I sincerely love it. I'm proud of what I do, I do a good job, and I enjoy it. I add value to the workplace.
But my reasons for needing a change are larger than my reasons for staying. They mean more to me.
I hope that I don't look back and regret it, but I don't think I will. I regret the time I would have away from my family for the next few years, and that is time I will never get back. I don't need to be with them every second, but I do want to be there for the milestones, the dinners. The long run, if I can. There will be time in my life, I suppose, for a full-time job, or one that takes more of me than my off-time life - but now isn't the time.
It's going to take strength in me to do this.
On another note, I haven't lost any weight since the beginning of the month. It started out looking promising, but I'm no better off half-way through. I'm disappointed. Frustrated. I'm starting to get depressed, wanting to just curl up in a ball and not move for a long, long time.
I don't know if a shift in schedule (my job) will be what I need. I really don't.