Nervous

I'm nervous about going on vacation. It's so much planning. For me, the first few weeks of "getting back on track" I kind of have to shut down on social activities. It's so easy to fall off the path (and so hard to get back on).

I'm glad I've had a few weeks of good choices behind me, and that I'm in that mindset. But I can't help but worry.

I'M SO AFRAID TO GAIN WEIGHT.

I'm afraid for my old patterns to rear their ugly head. It's happened time and time again.

Today I was set to go for dinner with a friend. We went for a walk instead. I can't chalk it all up to making a better choice, it was more circumstances. In a way I wish I would have went to dinner and had the opportunity to test my willpower. But it looks like that will have to wait until I'm out of my element, on the road, in different surroundings.

Gosh, I make it sound like I'm some kind of caged animal up for experiment.

One of the difficulties with travel (for me) is all of the planning that surrounds it. I have to factor in so many different things:

family choices
money
simplicity

I want simple meals, cheap meals - that everyone would eat. But I also want to stay within my calorie range. I guess, if I really wanted to go militant, I could pick up a bunch of Lean Cuisines for myself. Then I can make and feed (whatever to) my family, and have something easy for myself.

Maybe that's what it will take for me. I don't know.

God willing, I'll be back on Monday and I'll be 283 or under.

Have a great week and weekend!