252.8 (Let's Talk Weight And Life Changes)

I'm counting things as 252. Motivation.

In nothing but underwear (which is how I prefer to weigh myself), I was 252.8.
With my pajamas on, 253. I'm keeping the 252.

Jease, as the doctor I was 248 and that was over a week ago. But I'm not going to worry about that too much. I'm glad that scale is moving down again, but there's a part of me that doesn't quite believe it. What else is new?!

I seem to average about 4 pounds per month or about a pound a week, although I don't usually go down a pound each week. I tend to lose, hold, hold, lose a couple kind of thing. It might be hormonal, or that during my TOM, I hold the pounds that would normally show up as a loss.

Either way, the trend seems to be down still. Though I might panic one week, I'm happy for the movement.

EIGHTY FOUR POUNDS DOWN

I also noticed that this past week my weight didn't budge on the scale, but my body felt different. I want to remember what that feels like. I feel like the 260's is the "new me" - and where I could end up again if I don't stay the course. I want to remember what being below that number feels like. I know I'm not where I want to be in the end, but I also feel like I'm on my way there. Where will I feel 40 pounds down from here? I can't imagine. But I also couldn't fathom being at 252 again.

My next major mini goal (I don't know if I'll make it because my losses are so slow) is to be 100 pounds down by my birthday this fall. That would put me at 238. I have 14 pounds to go. I should be able to make it, but I know there are no guarantees. God willing, I will. I will.

1. My sister-in-law (I swear the ONLY PERSON WHO NOTICES I'VE LOST WEIGHT) said my face is slimmer. I've noticed, too. I took a selfie for Facebook, and my face looks slimmer. Period. It just does. My husband told me yesterday it it.
2. My husband also told me I'm smaller. He can tell. Thank goodness someone can. I think my kids can, they just don't say it. They hug me different, they look at me a bit different, they notice I'm working on something and seem to support it.
3. I have less social anxiety. I'm not so worried about tables, chairs, that sort of thing. 
4. I have more energy. The times where I would have not fetched this or went without that because I didn't want to get up - they're smaller. The other day I ran some errands, and I know I would have given up sooner 40 pounds ago.
5. I walk more. I really like to walk, to move my body and use it as a means to get somewhere. My 20 minute walks have turned into 30 minutes, and now go to 40 when I want to clear my head. It feels good. I feel lighter.
6. My thighs don't rub together as much. They feel different.
7. My pajama pants fell off today. Fell. Off!
8. I continue to be able to stretch further.
9. NO CLOSET CRYING. I can't remember the last time I sat in front of my closet, feeling like throwing myself off a bridge because I was so frustrated. Instead of worrying about what will fit me, I worry about what do I want to wear. What a different feeling of stress. It is a new lease on things. I feel so much better about picking out my clothes for the day. Besides simply being able to fit in more things, I feel good in them. What-what?!
10. I know this is a crazy thing to say, but inserting a tampon is easier at 250 than it is at 290. Just saying.