Cabbage Soup Day 1 Recap - 290

Day 1 of my RESET.  I'm drinking protein shakes (two kinds), and eating cabbage soup.  The

The cabbage soup comes from the Cabbage Soup Diet - google it.  It's been around a while.  I've eaten it before.  I doubled this and made a huge pot.  I also added extra pepper flakes and some Sriracha sauce because I like spice.  And a cup of corn.  And some lime. People eat this for seven days, I'm doing it for three.  I'm mostly doing it because it is low calorie, warm, and I want something I don't have to think about making for a couple days.  Something easy to grab.

It does sort of go against all my feelings for quick fixes and diet fads.  But it's not so much a quick fix on weight loss for me (although losing the 5 pounds I just gained would be nice); I have way too many pounds to lose.  But it's an approach to zapping my cravings, and getting me in line.  The diet has different foods to eat, depending on the day.  I'm really just using the soup, the shakes, and improvising, but trying to keep it to those two things as much as possible.

CABBAGE SOUP
Ingredients
½ head of cabbage, chopped (I used pre-shredded cabbage, aka cole slaw)
1 cup diced celery
1 cup onion, diced
1 cup carrots, diced
1 green bell pepper, diced
2-3 cloves garlic, minced
4 cups chicken broth
14 oz can basil, oregano, garlic diced tomatoes
1 teaspoon oregano
1 teaspoon basil
½ teaspoon red pepper flakes
black pepper, to taste
½ teaspoon salt (optional)

INSTRUCTIONS:
Heat 2 tablespoons of olive oil in a large pot over medium heat. Add celery, onions, bell peppers, and carrots. Saute until slightly tender. Stir in garlic. Add chicken broth. Stir in diced tomatoes (with juice - the whole can) and cabbage. Stir in spices and cook until cabbage is tender. Taste broth and adjust seasoning if needed.  I added the juice of half a lime, too.  I also don't like my veggies too soft, so I don't cook them all the way.

Original recipe says it makes enough for about 3 days, but that might be eating it all day?  Not sure.

Today has been OK.  I had my coffee and cream (2 cups) in the morning, followed by a Muscle Milk.   I went on about my morning and a couple hours later realized I was STARVING and feeling shaky and yuck.  I had my Level Life shake, drank some water, and headed out to do some light shopping.  

I really wasn't feeling well.  I should have had that shake earlier, I suppose.  I went into Costco and started shopping and did have one sample - chicken breast, plain - literally a bite of chicken.  I figured that was better than passing out, which was how I was feeling.  The shake must have made it into my system, and the chicken stopped my growling tummy.  I felt fine after that. 

When I got home I immediately started to assemble my soup.  I was actually looking forward to it.   One of my kids did remark on how snappy I was today.  It hurt my feelings.  I didn't want to say it was because I was denying myself regular food, though.  My kids wouldn't understand.  If I said I was trying to quit smoking they might (no, I don't smoke).  As it cooks now, it smells yummy.  I can't wait to dig in.  I don't even care that I can't have bread and butter or anything else.  I want my soup! 

I had another shake, this time pouring it into one of my favorite mugs to make it feel more special.

Nothing exciting, but I did prefer that to drinking it from the package it came in.

I think in total I had 4 cups of the soup and 4 shakes.  Then about 10PM I broke down and had a piece of fried chicken.  My stomach hurt, and I wanted to have a decent night sleep.  My calories were at >1000, and that's ridonkolous.

At any rate, that's what it is.  I think I drank ~13 cups of water, probably more.

I did not hit my 10,000 steps, I did not go on a walk.  Can't handle everything at once.

Woke up in the morning and I weigh 287.

Dangit

I did it again.

I feel bad for anyone who has to share space with me today. Me and my gas. I feel myself rearing up on that monthly friend and the cravings were intense. It's weird, how the body works. I have to put my willpower in check here, and ask it to man up, though. Period is no excuse.

The shame is, that, for each of those three candies I've consumed - I've drank a glass of wine.

Whaaaat?

Yeah. I said that. I'm being honest because it's either that - or you don't hear from me.

I need to look at what is driving this.

HORMONES. For sure. Undoubtedly. I could ignore that, but hormones have caused women to murder their own children. I can't do anything about the hormones directly, I guess. I can take the prozac (I didn't this month), but prozac isn't a hormone. It's an SSRI. I wish they could make an anti/pro hormone pill that works similarly. I've taken progesterone, and it magnified my issues. I've accepted... well, I'm accepting this is an issue for me and I need to figure out how to work around it.  I'm not sure if holing up with a bottle of wine and a bag of Russell Stover is the way to go.

Or is it?

STRESS. That's another one. Although, I've recognized that and am trying to deal with it better. Today was a rough day at work. My boss was not in the office, but she barked at me through email like a nagging disease, constantly sending me commands. I typed up a manuscript that she wanted done, completely formatted it - and then she sent me her "revised, updated version" even though it was past the deadline for such things. I was passive aggressive and pretended I didn't get the email until about 45 minutes before I had to leave. I know that's not right, and it's not helpful. I used to be so direct with people, and now I fail to do so.

I worry about feelings, consequences, and what people think of me. If you asked anyone I know, they would not identify that as a concern with me, but I think it's something I inherited from my mother, and you know the older you get the more that stuff starts to creep out? Well, there it is. I'm becoming her, and I really don't like it. Love her, but celebrate our differences.

Whoa. This third glass of wine isn't going down so easy. And I'm not craving the candy anymore. I think I've hit my wall. I've got a million and one things to do, too (dinner, laundry, checkbook balancing, bill-paying)... but I wanted to check in here and keep myself accountable.

I'm still under calories, by the way. And instead of indulging food-wise, I ate a huge tomato salad with homemade ranch dressing. If I can balance it, I'll go for a walk tonight. All is not lost.

I'm Not Going To Make It

I've got some good news, and some bad news. Which one do you want first?

Bad?

OK.

BAD NEWS:
I've had this goal of trying to get down 100 pounds before my birthday and there's literally no way.

I counted I have 7 weeks. That would be a bit over a pound a week.

I just don't think I can do it.

I mean, yeah. I don't think so. I was trying in my head to say - maybe if you pushed it super hard?

But... that's just not me. I don't push super hard like that because it generally leads to a rebound of crazy eating patterns. My body can only take so much deprivation.


GOOD NEWS:
I had a good day yesterday. I want to go back to the "no alcohol" thing for a few days - maybe even a week. That would take me over the weekend, which would be a struggle, but I'm contemplating. Alcohol stalls my weight loss, but it also feeds me carbs and sugar (in the form of red wine). I eat more when I have drinks for two reasons:

Cocktails taste good with food

I'm in the habit of "buffering" the alcohol and carbs with food.

I notice I'm less hungry and more satisfied when I'm not having cocktails.

So, for me, drinking daily isn't conducive to weight loss - even if it is a glass of wine at night.

Hmm. As I read this I'm not really sure if that's "good" news. I love my red wine. But - when I'm not drinking my red wine, I love fitting into my clothes and feeling better in my skin. I have to remember that and remind myself of it often.

This is NOW and right now, I'm trying to lose, not maintain. It's just not an option right now.

Oh, and I think I sleep better when I don't have a cocktail.
I'm also less likely to be dehydrated.

Need I more reasons?

That’s because alcohol cravings and carbohydrate cravings seem to have similar origins in the brain. (link)

I don't know what the rest of that site is like, but I've read about this on more than one site; the sentiment is the same.

My not drinking of alcohol at times is necessary so that I don't switch my carb addiction to something new. I know I can go without sweets for lengths of time, but then I still have wine as a crutch. Can I go without both? Yes. Is it fun? Not really (I mean "fun" socially or taste-wise). But if I had both daily I'd feel like crap and be chasing carbs in a circle. I can't do that.